Frozen Words

Isn't it nice that you can love someone for who they are? Like, you know they won't be perfect because no one is. But for you, that person is just everything you ever wanted to complete your life. There are times when you feel like that person might not be the one, that he might hurt you one day but then your heart tells you that it's never going to happen because he is the one. He is what you will need at the darkest times, on the brightest day. He is the only one who will be there when you are at your worst and when you are at your best. It's wonderful how your heart can be so sure of something that your mind has doubts about. Someone I really love once said, "No matter what, always listen to your heart. Because your mind knows everyone and everything but your heart knows only you." The following poem is something I wrote yesterday because I just had this sudden urge to tell him how much I want to hold my hopes high because of him and how bad I want to los...

I heard goodbyes are always bittersweet. They come without warning and live with us for the rest of our lives in our memories or maybe, if you are someone like me, they get out. Out of your mind, out of the bounds we set for that kind of pain. I heard people always find it hard to move on. It's natural. Of course, forgetting the memories, colour of his eyes or the way he made you smile is hard and your mind becomes so cruel in that period of time because it replays all the shattered broken promises. It replays the moments you don’t want to remember. The following poem is about how you realize that you are attached to him in every aspect of your life, how even changing your perspective won’t help you to move on, it’s about how you start to notice every the detail in nature just to take your mind off him but even that reminds you of him. The following poem is something that happens when your heart decides to go against your mind and keeps him forever within. ALMOST. The...

What do I miss the most about you? Let’s talk about it here. I miss a lot of things. Like the way it all began. The awkward, nervous phase that I was able to survive. It was very embarrassing but still, I enjoyed every bit of it. Oh, at that time I used to blush by your name and seeing you just once would make my day. It was the best time of my life so far. And then, life took an interesting turn, we fell in love. Or at least that’s what we call it, right? Was it meant to be? I don’t know. I don’t even know if it was the right thing. But it felt right and at that time, at that moment, the only thing mattered was you. I now know that it was a mistake but I think this mistake was worth making. I think this mistake was something that told me ‘Everything makes sense. Even though it wrecks your heart to know the truth, after hearing it you will start to heal.’ I miss being in love. That feeling when you see your lover. Like butterflies rising in your stomach, like just want to go ther...

She loves him differently. She loves him like you love looking at rainbows, like you love singings songs in the shower like you love weekend mornings. She loves him like that. Like his eyes are the ones where she wants to get lost in like his smile is the only thing that keeps her smile alive, like his voice is the only thing she can never get tired of hearing, like his name, is the only thing that can make her heart happy, like he is the only one she needs by her side while looking at sunrises and sunsets. Loving him is hard. It's like waking up early in the morning knowing that you didn’t even get 2 hours of sleep. It's like living in a world where there is no way you can see what’s in front of you, you just have to simply keep walking, being ready for anything at all times. Loving him is like trying so hard to tell yourself that it's okay but still knowing inside that it never will be. Loving him is like surviving in a war. It's like that breath you have to tak...

A few days back, I was going through an old file I kept with all the letters to my future self and while reading those, I felt like this is crazy. A good kind of crazy. I mean, did I know that there will come a time when I will need those words I wrote a year ago without knowing anything about where I will be in a year or so? It feels really amazing to read it now, feels like I knew I am going to need this. That is when I got the idea to write a poem for the 'old' me. Now, I am 18. So, as a teenager, there are many things which could've gone wrong, which changed me completely. But I want to thank that me who went through everything and still stayed true to herself. There are many things I wish I knew before, many things I wish I told myself but that doesn't mean I regret not knowing them at that time. I listed a few things in the poem below. Things I want her to know, things I want her to believe, things I want her to see and things I wanted her to feel. Dear Old Me...

Its weird, isn’t it? Loving a part of someone. A smile or colour of their eyes but not their soul. I mean, it hurts a little less. Though it gives away so many lies and takes away your soul’s little piece. This blog is about that someone, about that feeling which came while looking in his eyes and hearing him calling my name. He is like a winter morning but right when the sunshine hits your cold body. So peaceful and feels like flying. I loved him. I really really did but did he love me? The question with an answer which changes very frequently. Even though sometimes it feels like he really did love me like he said, after that one session with my counsellor, I doubt him. The thing is, I have been holding all these words for a long time now and I guess, it's finally time that I let it all out. Because it's way heavier than I thought and even though he was my everything once upon a time, now just thought of him feels unfamiliar. There are nights when I miss him like cra...

This is for the ones who are not here anymore. For the ones who gave you so many memories, for the ones who shared million laughs with you and the ones who were there standing by your side. Losing someone is never easy. At that time, you want to hold onto false hope that maybe this all is just a lie. You hope that this is just a nightmare. And you don't believe the truth. Your mind already knows it but your heart never wants to accept it. But then after a while it hits you. So hard. And you just stare at nothing replaying every single time you saw that someone, every single thing you talked about. You read the old texts, you see the call history, you look for them in crowd even after knowing that it's of no use, you look at the stars and wish so many times for them to come back but you know the truth and trust me, you will accept it... it just takes time.  See, after accepting the truth, you start to notice their presence in your heart. You start to realize that they never lef...