Frozen Words

Not a single heart is meant to stay broken forever. Broken hearts are just another reason why we go in search of love or why we don't go for searching at all. I say, you should go. You have to put yourself out there because you have to find love for no one else but you. The thing is, when your heart is shattered into pieces, when the pain is unbearable.. You always find a way. A way to get yourself out of that misery, a way to make your heart stronger, a way to be new version of you. You build your walls higher than before. One brick at a time and those bricks represent all those tears your eyes lost, all those heart aches and everything that made you feel lost in the first place. But no matter how high you build your walls, there is always that one person which can make those walls disappear just after looking in your eyes. And trust me, you wouldn't think twice to let it all fall down to the ground... Even if he is the reason why you had your guards up. Because he, my darling...

Hello everyone! Haven't posted in a while and I am sorry for that. So that is why in this blog you will see a poem. For someone who is far away from me but still, I can sense his presence, for someone who doesn't know me yet but hoping that someday he will, for someone who made me the happiest girl and for someone who is loved... YOU. I remember that time when I had no idea of your existence, when I was unaware of love, of hope, and unaware of faith and miracles. Then one day was enough, to let me know that it exists, to make me realize that happiness exists, in many ways, in small things.    Like chirping of birds in the morning, and watching sunsets in eve. That could fill any heart with joy, with a smile on face which could last a lifetime. But for me, I've found my happiness within you. your voice, your eyes, your smile My way for happiness is you and luckily, my destination too.                   ...

We all have one moment of weakness and if you are someone like me… that moment changes your life forever. In fact, it changes ‘you’ forever. I had that. So many times, when I was surrounded by him or his thoughts. And trust me, you have to learn how to survive that. To be honest, I learned but it was kind of difficult. It took a lot of time and I lost one thing while surviving through this love game while learning to swim without any surety of being successful. It was 'swim or drown' kind of situation. I learned to swim but like I said I lost something. I lost the old me. Forever. So, given below is a letter I wrote after realizing the power I got after losing ‘her’. It’s the letter for him. Just to let him know how he made the biggest mistake of his life by hurting one little thing inside my mind. Dear Player,       The old me was somewhere deep inside shallow part of my heart and last night I destroyed her. I killed her. I killed a part of me, the innocent one ...

We all have that one chapter in our story which we never read out loud, which we’d keep to ourselves forever inside our hearts and in back of our minds... But that doesn’t mean that you never replay it to yourself. I guess this is the time I let go of this chapter from my mind, at last, the one I never told to anyone but myself over and over again... I guess this is the time you all deserve to know the pleasure I got after all the pain I’ve been through on this journey… At that time I was wandering inside the sea of emotions and feelings which were just temporary but well I found him there, a wanderer and so far I thought he was my only way to shore... I read somewhere, “If you want something from the depth of your heart, you’ll achieve it… One day.” And trust me, the moment I saw him... I thought this is what I meant to find on that one day, that he is the home for my lost soul... But just like always, emotions clouded my vision and with him, I felt like I’m on cloud nine......

You know everyone has their moment of weakness... Where they feel their heart breaking.. Where all voices around them just disappear and the voice inside keeps getting higher. Screaming and fighting for something that's not worth those tears, those protests.. I remember the time I had one of those moments.. At that time, I wasn't crying nor I was angry.. I was hurt, I was numb. I guess, I was naive. Some truths are better left unsaid. Because even if telling those to someone will make you feel relieved.. There still are some chances that the person whom you told all your truths, your secrets can backfire you. And lies... Well, who doesn't lie? Even me, right now telling you all this stuff.. I know I'm hiding something big behind each and every small word. And only I am able to figure it out.. No one else. Alright, so back to my hurtful yet memorable moment, I think at that time I was lost within myself, I was scared to accept the reality... I assume I was just afraid ...

It was just too late for me to understand that you were just a chapter in my life, not a whole story. And I got stuck by the time... I knew I will get out of our chapter eventually because its never too late but I also knew that there is a reason behind every happening. I couldn't stop but wonder what that is... So I kept re-reading that chapter, never got enough of you and your charisma... never knew that there are more chapters which are just waiting for me to read them...  But I knew there was something wrong in our chapter... Something like a missing page, like a forgotten promise, like an incomplete end... I thought I will figure it out before its too late but destiny wanted something else... I kept looking, I kept digging for something which maybe never was there.. But I was damn sure that you had dark secrets craved under your skin and I had that burning flame inside me which was ready to peel off your skin to finish that every single drop of black blood flowing inside you...

I had a life you know... A whole different one than the one I am living right now... It was a simple one. Without any confusions, misunderstandings and complications... It was truly amazing and I was really grateful to live in it... But then, he came and my life... My whole life flipped... Upside down. He was like a rainy day... It will make you feel all lazy but comfy at the same time... He was like a storm... Either you have to wait till it passes or you have to go through it if you want to reach on the other side... For what I remember now... I decided not to wait for it to pass, I decided to go through that dangerous storm because I was excited, I was searching for freedom, I was nervous and most of all... I was looking for an adventure... He was a whole new level of adventure and that was the only power he got on me... His thrilling beauty within a beast itself. The first time he ever caught my attention was back before I even had a thought that I might fall in love with him. It...